Tomorrow

Hi Bryant,

Well this past week has been crazy. Everyone is doing good, missing you, of course, but keeping your memory close. We got the thumbies, so now we have your thumbprint closeby :) And of course, Emily and I have matching lockets, Julia wants one too. They are on us always, memories of you close by our hearts.

We went to the Planetarium on Saturday. It was a beautiful day. Hana met us. You would have liked that part, seeing Hana. Otherwise, I think you'd have been quite bored. One thing we did was hitch rides on a helicopter. You've done that before, but as a med flight which probably doesn't count, plus it was dark out. I think you would have been thrilled with a day, non-med flight in the helicopter. You were always a thrill seeker!

I remembered when we went to the Planetarium a few years ago. You've been there several times, but the last time was with me, Christine and Hana. You saw a movie there and then we walked around and saw a presentation / show and other stuff. So, it's like you are everywhere, always. You were always up for whatever adventure we had planned. And you'd always let us know, quite clearly, how you thought and your opinion of it ;}

Emily has been busy planning the Prom. I wonder if you would have gone. Probably. I am thinking it would have been fun. Graduation will be coming and I think Emily will get your "diploma". Things are in the works for several groups to honor your memory. So a lot going on. I wrote an article for the New Boston Bulletin about your life in New Boston.

Liam is playing t-ball. I remember you with your sports stuff. You liked it okay, nothing too exciting. I also was out shopping yesterday to get a VHS to DVD converter. I am going to convert all our hours of tape onto the DVD's to keep your precious memory on home video :) As you know, we have HOURS on end of it.

That got me thinking about some stuff. I watched the Hilton Head one. You were 12 I think. It was a lot of fun, it was windy on the beach and the waves were kicking. You were smiling because you loved the beach AND you loved the wind. What a perfect combination :) But what I thought about was your life and how we lived it. We rarely gave thought to "tomorrow" because we knew we had to live each day in the moment. So, we took every opportunity to do stuff. The van was packed, OMG, I mean packed. The hotel room / suite was packed. Crazy. To see it is amazing. All the medical stuff, all the supplies, traveling across the country.

Your choice of movie was "Mary Poppins" and you were watching it in the van and in the hotel room. So many memories. The thing is, Bryant, we always lived for today. We never said "Oh that can wait for tomorrow" - well maybe we said that about stuff we DIDN'T want to think about. But everything else, well that was for TODAY. And we did it, huh? We traveled, we saw, we did.

I know as I watch the 60+ hours of video, it's gonna really be amazing to see how much we did and how much you lived. I already know that, but I think SEEING is something else. to see it all again, to re-live it all again. The funny thing is, we used to come home from our excursions and trips and maybe watch the home movie and then put it away, for tomorrow. Because we had more to do.

Some mornings, particularly in the Winter, we'd pull one out while planning our next adventure, but mostly the home movies were for another day. That day has come now and I will watch them, copy them to DVD and hold the memory close. But, I also know "today" is here too and we have to keep your memory alive and with us and not slip into the past.

So along you come with us in our new adventures. Maybe you'll be gracious enough to guide us along, nudge us when we need it. That's how you always have been. Thanks for that Bryant. 20 years of life.

It might amuse you to know that Liam is into Star Wars right now. He got a Nintendo game and it plays constantly. It's great though because you were into Star Wars with Mark Hamill so it seems to be normal, just regular normal noise.

I miss you and I love you, we all do,
Hugs and Kisses - Mommy